I’ve recently released my second book entitled Victimproof – How I Learned to Overcome Bullying. Since “Victimproof” is a made up word, people are always asking me what it means. I always summarize it by saying, “You can’t control whether or not you get bullied, but you CAN control whether or not you become a victim.”
Let’s go a little deeper by defining what a victim is (ie: the opposite of being victimproof). Victims are people who feel powerless to change their life circumstances. They feel like they have no control over it, so they play the blame game saying things like: I had no choice! You made me do this! It wasn’t my fault! Why do I always get singled out? It’s not fair! Everyone’s out to get me!
But being victimproof is just the opposite. People who are victimproof have the attitude of personal responsibility. They “own” their life, their actions, and their outcomes. They feel responsible for their own destiny. So when life deals them a tough challenge, they skip the blame game and go right to “How can I solve this?” Depending on the circumstance, “solving it” could mean speaking up for yourself (or for someone else). It could mean getting help from a trusted adult. It could mean befriending the bully and showing kindness. It could even mean creating boundaries in your heart, so the bully doesn’t affect you so deeply. Watch this anti-bullying video for a better explanation.